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Shofar FTP Archive File: people/s/schoedel.ronald/personal-letter-v2


Message-Id: <2.2.32.19960710152824.007161c4@mail.winternet.com>
Date: Wed, 10 Jul 1996 10:28:24 -0500
To: kmcvay@nizkor.almanac.bc.ca
From: Joel Rosenberg 
Subject: Schoedel rewrites history, "Slightly"

>From his web site:  (Note "slight" revisions.)

The following letter was mailed to supporters of this ministry around the
world, as an explanation of the events of
May, which led Rev. Ron to temporarily resign from the ministry, and even to
pull this website offline. Please peruse
it carefully, as we believe it contains important information and spiritual
insights that can prove helpful to many
others who may be facing trials and troubles.



           Rev. Ronald C. Schoedel, III
           Monclova, Ohio 43542-0012






Updated slightly 9 July 1996


Dear friend,


Greetings brethren and sisters in the Faith, I trust that as summer begins
(again, so soon!) that
you are doing well and enjoying the many abundant blessings of our Father
Yahweh. It has been
a while since your editor has had the chance to sit down and type a long,
personal letter to our
friends, so I am really feeling blessed now to be able to share with you
what=B9s going on with the
ministry now.


God has been revealing Himself to me in great and wondrous ways these last
several weeks, that
I just have to share with you what He is doing in my life, and through the
ministry here. As
you=B9ll note from the return address, we are once again in Ohio. In=
 January,
as you may know, I
packed up and headed for the great white north, where I settled down in
southwest Alaska. It is
the happenings during my Alaskan odyssey that I wish to focus on in this=
 letter.


If you have never been to Alaska, by all means, let me encourage you to
PLEASE take a trip
there sometime. Never before in my life have I seen a land more beautiful
and more varied in it=B9s
beauty, than the great state of Alaska. Contrary to what most think, it does
not snow there
year-round and it=B9s not below zero every day, either. In fact, the climate
of Alaska is as varied as
the climate across the lower 48. I mean, we are talking about a state that
stretches east to west
the same distance from Maine to California, and north to south, the distance
of North Dakota to
Texas. The 21 smallest states of the union could fit inside Alaska=B9s
borders, with room to spare.
Quite a diverse and exciting place to visit, and anyone with an appreciation
for the unspoiled
beauty of over three million lakes, mountains galore and flower-covered
prairies stretching for
boundless miles will appreciate a trip to Alaska.


Little did I know when I headed north what Yahweh would have in store for
me, and just what
this trip would mean in my life. My intention was to move to Alaska, far
away from all the
distractions and cares of the more urbanized world. For five months I did
just that, and I loved
every day of it. So you may well be wondering, why did I return? Allow me to
explain, and
please allow me the opportunity to share with you some rather personal
observations,
experiences and news.


May 14th, I announced to several of my closest ministry associates that I
had to resign from the
ministry indefinitely, and that effective immediately, all activities of
this organization were to
cease. I pulled our materials from the worldwide website we have on the
internet, recalled this
newsletter from the printing press and fell on my knees, pleading with God
for direction in my
life. I was met with a trial worse than any I could have imagined, and
needed help in a time of
some serious confusion. Well, as you can see, I am back in the ministry, the
website is back
online and THE TRUTH newsletter continues. What happened?


The worst time of my life -- and the most intense spiritual struggle I have
encountered -- started
the afternoon of May 13th. For about three weeks, I had been in Naknek,
Alaska, where I had
taken a new job and was about to begin getting ready a home for my fianc=E9e
and I, who was
back in Dillingham, Alaska, where I had been since January. The big day had
been set for the
26th of September, when Vanessa and I would be married, and begin our lives
as ONE, with
Christ at the center of our relationship. Vanessa is a wonderful, beautiful,
Christian young lady
who I had met right upon my arrival in Alaska, and on April the 10th, after
we had sufficient
time to determine that we shared the same ideals, goals and beliefs, I asked
her to marry me.
What a wonderfully delightful and memorable occasion it was when I asked
her, and she happily
and with tear-filled eyes said =B3yes=B2.


May 13th, at twelve noon, I checked my fax machine, which had just rung. To
my horrific
surprise, and utter amazement, I found out that Vanessa was NOT going to be
my bride after all.
>From nowhere, with no warning, no signals or anything. As you might imagine,
I was caught off
guard totally. But of course, life goes on, so I prepared myself for work
that day, and headed to
the radio station. While at the station, another fax came across, this one
with a bit of an
explanation as to what in the world was going on. Still, not an explanation
that made much
sense to me.


I must say at this point, that I am not known as a rash individual. I am not
one to make hasty
decisions usually, and not one who does anything without seriously
committing every step I
take in life to prayer, asking Yahweh=B9s will and direction. Vanessa had,=
 in
four months, never so
much as disagreed with any of the ideals and beliefs that I hold dear to my
heart, and which I
used to preach to the world as one of the world=B9s most effective Christian
Israel outreaches. My
convictions are my being, and I have always stood steadfast for the truth of
God=B9s word, which
has meant in times past that I have avoided pursuing relationships with
anyone who did not
share my convictions and beliefs. In marriage, the two MUST be of one mind,
in agreement on
all things. Vanessa and I decided to marry with the understanding that we
were just that.


I spoke with her after her second fax, and tried to understand why she felt
she had to back out.
She wasn=B9t sure, she said, but she knew she had to. She honestly felt God
was directing her in
doing so. We hung up the phone, with the understanding that was to be our
last contact, ever.
Sad, confused, shocked and just generally bewildered, I fell on my knees and
cried out to God,
asking for His guidance, His comfort and His spirit to be with me. I was
very confused. I felt
God had told the two of us, that He wanted us to marry. I honestly believed
that with every fibre
of my being. So now I was left wondering, had I missed God=B9s will in this?
Had Vanessa? Was
this God=B9s way of trying to get me to correct something in my life?


For a week, I battled with these questions. It was intense battle, I might
add. I searched my soul
for any little thing I could find, to see if there was anything displeasing
to God in me. I
committed all my beliefs and convictions to God, asking Him to please show
me if I was wrong
in anything. And immediately, I decided I had to resign from the ministry. I
could not go on
preaching, especially while I wasn=B9t sure for a while what in the world I
believed. I thought =B3God
if I missed your will in this relationship, what else have I missed You in?=
=B2
I announced my
resignation to the world via the internet, and shut down our library on the
internet on the 14th.
More than a few people were surprised and confused, and they told me as
much. I=B9ll get into that
a bit later though...


Having now tried to remove myself from the public eye as much as possible, I
had to get into the
Word, and in an in depth way. I prayed incessantly for days on end, and I
heard God speak to
my heart on each of those days, telling me He was with me. It meant a lot to
know God was with
me in this trial and time of confusion.=20


Here I was, totally helpless and unsure of just about everything in life. My
engagement to a
lovely, beautiful young lady had fallen apart, I wasn=B9t sure of some of=
 the
things I had been
teaching and preaching, and I was now definitely confused as to why in the
world God brought
me to Alaska in the first place. I was truly totally helpless. In a
childlike way, I humbled myself
and acknowledged that our loving Father has me in His caring hands, and
would take care of me.
But in that week=B9s time of intense spiritual warfare, answers to my
questions seemed so far in the
distance, I thought they=B9d never arrive.


Tuesday afternoon, the phone rang. I had been up all-night Monday -- into
the late morning even
-- with some work (a couple days without sleep is nothing unusual for me) so
I was resting at the
time the phone call came in, half asleep. Surprised and astonished, I heard
Vanessa=B9s voice when
I picked up the receiver. It was then that God would give me the answers I
had sought. The two
days before this, I was regaining faith in my convictions and doctrines,
which I have so fervently
been teaching around the world through this outreach. But of course, as
anyone who has
struggled with something major in their life knows, it=B9s at those times=
 that
we frail human beings
are most apt to question our beliefs and search them, to see if they truly
are of God. By the time
I received Vanessa=B9s call that Tuesday, I was certain I had not erred in
anything I had been
teaching. I had received a touch from God that assured me I was walking in
His ways as I should
be. Please don=B9t take that to mean I think I am perfect...faaaaaaaaaar=
 from
it! But God had
spoken to my heart, to just rest in Him, knowing that in His proper timing,
He had an important
revelation to give me, but in the meantime, I was to go on believing as I
have been, and knowing
that I was preaching the truth.


His proper timing turned out to be about 3 that Tuesday afternoon. In a
brief conversation,
Vanessa explained and provided for me the answers I had sought from God the
past week. After
our talk, I came away feeling very thankful to our Lord for His grace and
mercy and
lovingkindness, that He could care so much for one so weak, feeble and silly
as I. Vanessa had
confessed to me on the phone that day, that she had lied to me -- she really
didn=B9t accept many
of God=B9s truths that I proclaim so boldly through this ministry.
Foundational doctrines that she
had before said we agreed on, she said she had deceived me about. We were
not of one mind
after all, though I was willing to make concessions and try to come to an
understanding, my
belief being that love covers all things and bears all things and can come
through all things.=20


My former fianc=E9e Vanessa and I parted ways perhaps forever that day, with
sadness, to be sure.
(When is anyone happy over a lost love and a failed relationship, especially
a broken
engagement?) But beyond the sadness, we each had a peace in our hearts that
this is what God
TRULY demanded of us for the time being. After our last conversation, I knew
in my heart that
we could not go on as one, together, as long as we had such vast differences
in our doctrine and
beliefs. I immediately went to God in prayer, joyous and so very thankful
that He had answered
my pleas for help! I was so thankful God had saved me from my own lack of
discernment, by
bringing a stop to something that (once the truth was revealed by Vanessa) I
now knew could
not go on for the time being, unless or until one of us has a major change
of heart. I was not
angry with her or upset at all, love bears ALL THINGS. Even if I did come
away from this
relationship feeling hurt and deceived, I won't ever hold that against
Vanessa, until I become
perfect and never-failing. I also prayed He would touch the heart of my
former fianc=E9e, and
guide her into all truth. I ask that you do the same, please.=20


I hold no malice or ill-will in my heart for the young lady. Only a godly
love and a desire for her
to experience the blessings of God as I have, and the Truth of God as I
have. How fervently I
pray that she might experience God=B9s love, and life more abundantly,
whatever roads she takes
through life!=20


At the same time, I find myself having learned a very humbling lesson about
trusting Yahweh
and not just accepting man=B9s word without seeking Yahweh as best we can.=
 In
this issue, I had
gone on my own, thinking I knew what God wanted. How grievously I erred. But=
 how
wonderfully kind God was in showing each of us that He had other plans for
the two of us, at
least for now. I thank God so very much for the entire experience, even if
for a while I felt like
I=B9d never make it through it. But He was with me through the trials and
troubles, and led me out!
Halleluyah!


As you know, I have resigned from the ministry, and have spoken out publicly
in my campaign
to distance myself from and to denounce the extremist sector of the "white"
movement (see
http://www.alaska.net/~schoedel/movement.html, which promotes hatred and
violence in the
name of Yahweh. Such things are totally unacceptable, and I can have nothing
to do with those
who try to use religion as a reason for such madness. My understandings of
many things are a
direct result from the broken engagement, to be honest.=20

Since I am once again single and thus more easily able to move about freely,
I have decided to
return to Ohio, where I will pursue God's will for my life and continue to
grow in His grace and
forgiveness. I plan to stick around in Ohio now, and have a new OH address,
which is RONALD
SCHOEDEL, MONCLOVA, OH 43542-0012. The Alaska mailing addresses, are of
course, out
of date. Our internet website has been taken offline, and I have resigned
from any public
ministry. The story behind the restructuring of my life and focus can be
found at
http://www.alaska.net/~schoedel/movement.html, where I discuss at length my
decision to
resign from politics and all of the things I was doing before.=20

I have learned that things are not always as they seem, that God is bigger
than our outward
cirumstances. Those trials that appear to us as too big are nothing for God.
And when God
makes us a promise, He keeps it. When God calls us for His work, He uses us.
And sometimes it
means He has to correct us lovingly, as He did with me, in telling me to
redirect my focus. I
never once in my time of trial doubted God=B9s sovereignty, majesty, love or
care, and He has only
shown me better exactly how much He does care for us. Praise Jesus!


I ask for your continued prayers, as well. Armed with these new lessons in
humility,
discernment and trusting in God, I am determined to carry on His will for me
in these last days.
Please pray for my continued strength and wisdom. Ask that God would watch
over me and
guide me, and show me His ways. I only wish to be led of the Lord. I also go
on alone however,
still desiring earnestly that God may one day allow me the fulfillment of my
number two goal:
my first is quite simple to serve God; the other desire of my heart: to one
day be a godly father
and husband. Beyond that, nothing else matters. I believe that is the way
God would have it, and
ask that you also pray for His will in my life in that regard as well. To me
there is nothing more
important than the hope of one day having a family of my own. One more
lesson I have learned
of late is the importance of finding the right mate to go through life with,
and that only
strengthens my desire to find the one who has been set aside by God to go
through this life with
me.


You all mean a lot to me, and your continued, prayerful support is
invaluable. It=B9s what keeps
me going. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, for your attention as I
have shared with you
my exciting and truly rewarding experiences, and for your prayers and
support. I love you all in
Christ, and will be praying for you as well. I remain, yours truly,


Humbly in the Master's service,

Ronald C. Schoedel, III
--------------------
Joel Rosenberg   http://www.winternet.com/~joelr
--------------------


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